Dame Edna, La Gran Imbecil

2003-02-05 - 5:32 p.m.

Every once in a while something comes across that will completely piss me off.

I don�t know if I�ve mentioned the fact that I am a huge fan of Salma Hayek. I have a huge girl-crush on her. I remember her on Mexican tv. She is on the February 2003 issue of Vanity Fair. This, of course, meant I had to buy it. This issue may become a collectors edition due to the fact that the Selma pictures in it where shot by Herb Ritts, a well known photographer who recently passed away. The article on Selma is lovely, and she talks about the fact that she was told time and time again that she�d never make it in Hollywood because she �sounded like a maid.� As we know she�s not only starred in movies, but is now producing them, too.

I am of the opinion that Vanity Fair has a limit when it comes to appearing Hispanic-friendly. God forbid they may not look WASPy enough, after all Selma Hayek (a MEXICAN actress) is on the cover. Now since Vanity Fair probably knows that Jews and African-Americans are a big no-no to offend, they�re moving on down the list of minorities. In the SAME issue, they allow bigoted remarks to be printed. In their Vanities section, under Ask Dame Edna, Dame Edna refers to Spanish as useless unless you want to talk to the help or your leaf blower. The level of hypocrisy in allowing this amazes me. Lets remind people, that Spanish speaking people are good only to serve. Damn, someone forgot to tell that to my cousin who works for NASA, and the one who works for the IRS (isn�t that bad drag queen living Stateside now?), the one who was a fire chief out in California, and the one who owns a dance company down in Yucatan. Not only are we a proud people, but we cover quite a few countries you bad drag queen! I have a few Latina drag queens that would love to give you a full makeover.

Now don�t you dare buy this issue! You may read it at the store, or if you�d like I�ll photocopy it for you and send you a copy. And if you want a copy from me you�d better let me know soon because I�m demanding my money back. I don�t care if it�s only $4.50, it�s the principle of the thing. I called Vanity Fair telling them such and they�ve tried giving me the run around. So, I�m typing up a scathing letter (and I am seriously considering Chou-Chou�s suggestion to make it in Spanish) to voice my displeasure. You will be very happy to know that the National Association of Hispanic Journalists (NAHJ) has already criticized Vanity Fair and sent a letter to the editor copying the Publisher and the Chairman. In case you would like to add your protests, I have a list of people you can send it to. Vanity Fair is owned by Cond� Nast who is in turn owned by Advance Publications, Inc. (don�t laugh I�m a resourceful person)

Mr. Graydon Carter, Editor, Vanity Fair
Ms. Dana Brown, Vanities Editor, Vanity Fair
Mr. Louis Cona, Publisher, Vanity Fair
Mr. S. I. Newhouse, Jr., Chairman, Cond� Nast
Mr. Steven T. Florio, President & CEO, Cond� Nast
Mr. Donald E. Newhouse, President, Advance Publications, Inc.

Vanity Fair
4 Times Square
New York, NY 10036

Cond� Nast
4 Times Square
New York, NY 10036

Advance Publications, Inc.
950 Fingerboard Rd.
Staten Island, NY 10305

You know, I never cared much for that bad drag queen. And how many languages does she know anyway? I speak two fluently and understand French, Portuguese and Italian. From the times I�ve seen her on tv, she�s barely managed to speak English, and its her own damn language. I know some might be thinking �Goddess, jeez it was meant to be funny� Maybe it was, but so was Jim Crow.